Balancing immediate family and inlaw stuff around birthdays and holidays is never easy. I thought I had it made this year. My family gathering wasn't scheduled on his mother's birthday (or anybody else's), I talked to my husband about it ahead of time and everything seemed like it was going to work smoothly. I relaxed and began to look forward to it.
Naturally, it didn't work this way.
My long-lost brother-in-law surfaced this week. We haven't heard from him in probably two years; Gary generally calls him if there's any exchange at all. He's having a big BBQ with his friends at the other other end of the lake, an hour from here. He wants us to come out for it tomorrow.
My husband really wants to spend some time with him and I completely understand why, but this presents us with a major conflict. My family is counting me being there (it's my birthday party too). So we kind of compromised. He'll take the boys and run over and see his brother in the morning, we'll go to my family gathering as scheduled in the afternoon. However the visit with his brother will be short and my husband is unhappy about it.
Dirty look. "It's never a good time to go see my family is it Mary?"
I can't win.
*Beats head against desk*
Whoever said "you're not marrying the family, you're marrying him (her)" didn't know what they were talking about.